A log in my eye...

God says "“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye." Matthew 7, 1-5.


Last night I had a rough night.  I have given up chocolate for lent (I'm realizing that I am more of a chocolate addict than I thought) and also i had gotten up early for work and I was tired from the day.  And while I was at a store buying something, I asked the cashier if I could return a kind bar because i didn't like the flavor.  He must've thought I had taken a bite out of it and wanted to return it because his response was "well you can't return it if you've opened it and eaten it."  And I laughed and responded in a way that wasn't related to that particular moment.  I laughed and said "I would never take a bit from something and then try to return it, do people actually do that?"  And he said "well you said you tasted it."  And I responded "yes but I have other bars."  So this conversation really triggered me, and I decided to dig out my own log in my own eye:)    When I was about 8 years old my parents divorced and I lived with my mom.  She waitressed for awhile but money got tight and she got hurt while at work and so stayed home raising three kids.   When I was about 12 we moved into a mobile home and we were pretty poor for awhile.   Things got tighter, but my mom never tried to get something for nothing.  She taught me to have integrity and to be honest, especially when it came to finances, and that is sort of ingrained in me.


Fast forward years later and I was married to a man who I helped make a bunch of money in the stock market and helped build a house with.  He treated me poorly at times and tried in many ways to distance me from people I loved in my life and also from a relationship with God probably because he was afraid of losing me.  He brought up sometimes in not so nice words how I had come from a family that didn't have much.  Don't get me wrong, I played my part.  I wanted to make him happy and supported us living very frugally for him to save.  We also were in the process of adoption.  I divorced him, with a heavy heart let go of the adoption, and in the process reestablished my relationship with God. I also lost alot of what him and I had worked for together, but I am grateful now for my relationship with God and I do pretty well on my own (also so grateful for that).    So after a long day I let this comment really get to me, meanwhile my logical mind (and now rested mind) knows the importance of not taking things personally, of self reflection and of looking at my own log:)

 

Have you ever had a situation where you realized you weren't looking at the log in your own eyes?



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